POW!!!

I'm reeling from the discovery that anyone actually reads this blog. Unfortunately, despite avoiding most names, someone has identified them self in one of my posts and has taken severe exception to what they found. There ARE people I have criticised and slagged off in this blog, it is my only socially acceptable response to the amount of 'sucking it up' I feel I am often forced to do. If one of the people I've actively criticised discovered this blog and vented their anger I'd be largely unconcerned but as it is someone who now, wrongly feels I have been untruthful to them whilst slagging them off behind their back I am sincerely saddened and seeking to make amends.

 I write this blog for my sanity!

 I find myself in situations where I am expected to be calm and polite and to accept the unacceptable with grace whilst a scene from a Kung Fu movie featuring much blood and carnage plays in my mind. I have been a lot more calm and able to deal with the crap on my plate of late, very much due to the ritual of sitting and writing my thoughts.

 I've apologised with sincerity to the person in question. A lot depends on their response but I think I managed to convey that my apology was unconnected to the connected issues. I am sometimes accused of bullying and insensitivity, so when it occurs and is in fact based on miscommunication or misunderstanding or my failure to convey my true feelings, I will make excessive effort to rectify it.

 I don't really know what I will do if decisions taken today stand: several more people than me MAY have their potential futures damaged as a result of my thoughtlessness -I have asked that be taken into consideration- I would happily withdraw if I have become an impediment.

 "Times are hard and friends are few": This ain't no time for cultivating new enemies!

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