...and thanks for all the fish!

I sat down to write this entry a couple of days ago but my preparations for leaving my job caused uncharacteristically busy days.

 I handed back keys and laptop and phone and LOTS of responsibility... and the security of a slightly laughable but vital wage check... 

 The adults with learning disabilities who are looked after by the organisation I've just left wanted to say good bye to me. I told them in complete honesty that they always cheered me up and were the best thing about my job: they greet me whenever they see me even if that's a dozen times in a day.

 Of course I've been reflecting on my current situation.

 The mistake was that my job was conceived without assessing whether it would be allowed within the organisation's "Charitable Objects". It turned out that even though my job was to create a separate, linked organisation that would do things that were outside the 'main' charity's "objects", the Charity Commission ruled that even that was breaking the rules. I'm sure this exact mistake is being made by charities many more times than the Charities Commission picks it up, but I am reminded of the arrogance of the "Consultant" who'd been responsible for planning and raising the funds for the job. She was 'nicely' paid by the accounts I've heard... If anyone was looking for blame...

 My gripe with my employers is that once I brought the problem to their attention, they made decisions that they neglected to share with me. I had to get good and blunt to find out what was going on. Rather than offering me redundancy at that time, they tried to make me stay on as their 'Keyholder/Building Manager".
I have a month more salary as I'm not having to work my notice and I intend to devote as much time as possible to getting the cash into CHN that it needs. I got one surprising and strong lead last week and found out that we've been rejected by another funder because the project is out of their patch. The results of 5 more applications are due in October and I'll be discussing a proposal for a major charitable appeal when my Co Director returns from holiday next week. I was first introduced to the project we're planning a year ago and started working on it in January. This week I've arranged for grants raised for the job I'm leaving to be repaid. If I had known the energies I gave to my "day job" were going to be ultimately futile, I'd have worked for CHN and we'd be running the project by now.

 The elation I expected from being 'free' to spend at least a month blitzing planning and fundraising for the project has been smothered by  not knowing if there is any way of reversing recent problems. I will carry on as positively as I can in the knowledge that there may be alternative locations. :-(

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Bon Voyage, Mon Enfant!

Image
It's hard dealing with the lack of communication let alone discussion of my Godson's immediate future. Its hard not to view my part in his recent past as a failure. The point is that it is over and I need to move on whilst there is still some relationship left between us. I'm getting quite 'Zen' in covering my frustrations with calm.  My Godson has always been unwaveringly CERTAIN of any decision concerning his learning that was opposed to mine. He was SURE that the scant attention he gave to his studies would at least yield passes. He dismissed my protestations that higher grades offered greater prospects as irrelevant. In exasperation I finally  reminded him and his father that he was here to go to school and that when that ended he would leave my home. His school career recently ended when he did not secure the grades to enrol into the final year.  My Godson is and always has been capable of cruising through a standard UK education, but it wasn't impo
Read more

Waiting!

Image
I love working with other people and I absolutely hate it too! I love it when I get people together who agree to do stuff but I get twitchy when they're late and I remember that everyone's doing everything "at risk" unless I'm fortunate-enough to have cash with which to bribe them! Yesterday I completed my proposal for our new proposed Main Project- I'm really pleased with it and very excited to submit it, but it would be a mistake not to share it with my colleagues- they're a great bunch when I can get their attention! I have always to remember that they're not as committed to the company as I am: they joined as a favour to me initially and though they've all benefited from it at some time in the last five years... except Wayne who we all forgot was on the Board -including him lol I can't expect anything from them really. So, I get into waiting for responses and starting other things and forgetting that I'm waiting (I'd get annoyed
Read more

Gyre

Image
From time to time I notice the patterns I make in my life; the recurring themes, the 'deja vu and 'Oh, not again!' moments... I don't spend much time on self-reflective introspection out of a combination of embarrassment and fear. It hasn't stopped me unloading onto one or two toking-buddies on a regular basis, but I try not to be one of those who becomes so intimate with their own navels that they're end up being dull or even toxic. The fear is also about having to focus on the things in plain sight that I choose not to see or wrongly ascribe to factors out of my control. When I was a (sole black) first year drama student at university I was ever-so-gently cornered by all three of the lecturers and asked what I thought about playing Othello. I was surprised enough to think it was a joke and quipped that I couldn't play Othello (I was 18 and seven or eight weeks into a degree course) and that they were only asking me to save on make up (or something li
Read more