What a Year!
It seems to happen when I get busy, which is silly because that's when things are most interesting.
Anyway: BIG CHANGES this year include getting a job I really enjoy and the approaching end of my responsibilities to my Godson.
In March I got a job working for an organisation that serves adults with learning disabilities: Daybreak Centres Ltd. They've taken over a community centre from Newcastle Council on what was once notoriously Newcastle's "worst" estate. Daybreak use the building Monday - Friday until 3.30pm and at other times its up to me to organise and programme activities to entice the estate's residents back into the building. It is a great, people-centred organisation and I like my boss. What's even better is the fact that my first job was in a community centre and though that was a long time ago and in a different city, it was not like starting a new job but like dusting off some primary skills. I even get to start teaching performance again next week. The Board are a bit "meh" - like most voluntary sector Boards I've served, but my boss has to deal with them much more than me so I can stay relatively chilled (even though they put back my work by five weeks with a mistaken decision they were forced ultimately to overturn).
As for my Godson... I've written here from time to time about my disappointment then frustration and occasional FURY in dealing with him. The issue is that he IS a bright kid, but he believes he is more intelligent than he obviously is. I agreed to look after him whilst he was at school but as I realised he wasn't putting any effort into his school work I made it clear to both him and his father than as soon as his school life was finished, I would relinquish responsibility for him. After almost no revision or preparation his last exam results were too pitiful for him to be accepted into the final year so is being directed towards apprenticeships. I have NO confidence in him taking charge of his life and refuse to fund a lifestyle of sitting about playing computer games when he deigns to get out of bed. I also want my life back and to free myself of the bad karma of suppressing my anger at what he does and does not do.
His next step is housing for 16-25 year olds provided by the city. I almost wish I could be there when he spends his first few nights amongst "young people with complex needs", perhaps he'll then appreciate what I have given him for the last four years. I just look forward to not having to think about him any more. He was to have been the beneficiary of any 'estate' I might have left. I made it clear to him that was not to be the case- in part because I worried that he wasn't bothering to work because he knew that at some future point I'd kick the bucket and he'd get a wodge of folding money. I'd rather donate it to HIV research!
Despite the failed parenting attempt my life is pretty good. My job is SO exciting as I get a chance to develop both an "Environmental Discovery Centre" and an "Enterprise Park" for light industrial/craft businesses from scratch. I was nearly scammed by a Ukranian pretending he was besotted by my online profile and I reconnected with a complete idiot I'd met in Deptford days who lied about moving up to Newcastle so that he could organise a few 'dirty week ends'- until I confronted him and sent him packing. For MONTHS afterwards he pestered me with texts and messages that could go under the general heading "The Problem with Oscar" until he finally admitted that he had lied at which time I told him that he could continue to send stuff if he wanted to but that I wouldn't respond. I wanted nothing more to do with him. I broke my vow a few weeks ago when I told him to FUCK OFF, when he started hinting he wanted another chance or some such.
I even made it back to Laurieston for a Gay Men's Week a few weeks ago and it was such fun to be able to drive myself there. Laurieston is facing a crisis that I'll write about in later posts. It was great to meet up with David Adler and to actually get to know Dave and Stephen. ECC [Edward Carpenter Community] is at a crossroads and it was weird hearing my 'ex' being described as the Bogey Man, causing all sorts of difficulties. Though I recognised some of what they said I found it hard to believe that Peter would be as obstructive as they said he was being. It is painfully clear that ECC is more and more of a monoculture of middle-aged and older white, middle class men. The more cynical suggest we could just wait a few years before the Old Guard die or start something new. Their upcoming 'AGM' (which is not what they call it) will be a very interesting time. I really don't want to go, but I feel a bit duty bound to try to offer some support to the reformers- some of whom are daring to articulate heresies like changing the name!!!! -Then we discovered the fairly haphazard way the organisation's name was originally chosen I felt happy about it being retired.
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