Getting Back Into It

I suppose you might call it "Post Vacation Inertia" but it has been a bit of struggle getting back into a rhythm of even thinking about work. Not having a job to go to is part of it though my first action this last week was to submit an application for a job I had taken with me on holiday and looked at once, for ten minutes. At least I got it submitted by the deadline, but as they've not got back to me, perhaps it wasn't my best work as I haven't heard back from them. In all honesty; I wasn't excited by the job which isn't a good sign, I just know I could do it. It is increasingly true that job descriptions are getting bigger as the salaries offered diminish, I'm sure this job would have offered at least five to eight thousand pounds more a couple of years ago.

The first day back was a glorious spring day, since then, this corner of the country has been clouded in gloom while most of the rest has been basking in sun.

I did have a meeting with one of my CHN colleagues to discuss "future projects". It was a good review of ideas but in itself a little soul-destroying to revisit good ideas that have never been realised for lack of cash and the active opposition of those maintaining the status quo. It is hard not to feel like so much time has been just wasted, so much energy and effort ignored and so little progress made in arts and culture in this region and that the most that has happened is that certain people and their friends are even more secure in their positions. The people I worked for in Blyth are not that unusual when considered alongside some public sector arts officers who have clung to their posts for decades and become expert in clinging on rather than developing a landscape and ecology for innovation and inclusion. Whilst those people are where they are, few opportunities to do anything truly innovative are likely to arise- unless we can secure a massive cash injection from somewhere else.

I think of the City Temple and weep about what could be being achieved there NOW. The auction must have happened by now, I wonder if it was sold and to whom. I notice that the old Dance City building is for sale for £500,000, it tickles me to think of acquiring it to deliver our ideas so close to a building that has changed from one of the most accessible arts venues in the city, to a stifling and elitist bastion of privilege and lip service.

I am working on a revamp of a proposal for which we received funding last year but NINE subsequent applications to secure £5,000 of "matched funds" have since failed. In the mean time, three of the LGBT organisations cited in the proposal have folded (two of them might have survived had we been able to deliver our project). I am forced to consider approaching the owners of the city's commercial LGBT venues, if you know of any of them you'd understand my reticence. Still: needs must. 

An interesting notion arose from our "Future Projects" meeting: a performance school. I really like this idea; I have experienced some VERY dodgy institutions claiming to provide performance training and charging hapless parents and older students exhorbitant fees for chances to achieve dreams of stardom and I know we could do a lot better than that. I also realise that a lack of a building needn't impede this idea: we've just completed a research project showing the wealth of underused community venues in the city; it would be simple enough to book spaces all over the city to offer training etc.

I still dream of establishing a People's Centre, like Laurieston Hall. On one of my last days on holiday I woke with a strong feeling that it was what I need to be doing, but again: it would take a lottery win or some such good fortune to acquire the appropriate property.