Wildewire

I have adopted a "watching" brief reguarding the Gay groups to which I have belonged. This was prompted by their indifference to the murder of George Floyd and the resurgence of Black Lives Matter and their dismissal of my requests to address ethnicity in their activities. In the case of the Fae, an argument with their defacto leader precipitated an instant withdrawal, with ECC it has been more gradual as I realised how little they've developed in over thirty years. Today, I found myself 'liking' a FB post about Botswana's government rejecting an attempt to recriminalise LGBTQ relationships. I was shocked to then find that not only was it on the Fae page, but it had been posted by its 'High Priest'(sic) himself. I thought about it briefly before un-liking the post. I have noticed that few of the couple of thousand members ever participate in the FB group, part of me did not want it to seem more interesting that it is (LOL). I just did not want to conne...

   A couple of months ago,  I wrote about "drifting"; it was a feeling that my days were morphing into one another without the sense of achievement to which I have grown accustomed when I have been employed. Not a HUGE amount has changed since then, I suppose that I am quietly accepting a lower set of expectations for myself.  I've had the last pre-selection  session with my supervising social worker before an online 'panel' where they will interview me and review paperwork etc. I hope there will be no issues- my run-in with the potty- mouthed woman in 2015 that led to ME getting fined for calling her a "Fat Slag" has been mentioned. I suspect nothing will come of it as it was a six month suspended sentence so has been vacated long ago. There are things about interacting with public sector agencies that are immensely frustrating when their actions are held up to even basic 'common sense'; individual operatives fear deviation from rules and procee...

Most of the 'training' so far has been reflective: I've been asked to describe circles of contacts, relationships, sources of support etc. I've noticed a strong emphasis on 'family histories' which I found a little uncomfortable- not because I don't really want to talk about it- which I don't, but more because there seemed to be an unrealistic emphasis on what I said about my family relationships. I resist this. I am happy with my decisions to distance myself from my birth family. I reject the bullshit that says that you have to love/respect your biological family- not if they're knackers you don't! I've made my own family! OK so, moving to Newcastle has reduced the number of people on whom I know I can unequivocally call, but that is better than the death by a thousand financial cuts I was experiencing from my mother and brothers before I disappeared to Newcastle, (it was a year before I contacted my mother to tell her I had moved out of Lon...